There are times in life that each of us struggles. About two years ago I went through a major life change, the big “D”. And really…I thought I was doing well (besides the fact that I’m basically a recluse). Tonight though a bombshell was dropped, and I came to the realization that my oh-so-perfect life was lacking.
While I’ve led a good and moral life in the two years since the big “d”, I’m also lacking, which is just as bad. How have I been lacking? 1) I’ve been complacent with holing up, 2) I’be been lukewarm, 3) I’be been dead inside, and 4) I’ve lacked forgiveness. For item #1, I’ve been okay with just living. No more. I’m ready to move on, to start over, to really move forward and just allow myself to feel human again. #2 – lukewarm. This is worse than being hot or cold at something, because I just “was”.
- numb inside and outside, nothing bothered me, I felt nothing. That has to change.
My final point on forgiveness is forgiveness of self. Through these last two years, my biggest critic was probably myself. I see people from “before” and they refuse to look at me, and I analyze. I don’t know who to blame. So from today forward, I’m doing just that…moving forward. Putting one foot in front of the other, being human, and living life to it’s fullest.
Life has a way of throwing detours at us. We cannot avoid these detour moments in life…no matter how hard we try. Funny thing is, often our destiny comes about via detour. I am at this point in my life because of a detour. The detour called divorce. I had not planned it, yet it happened.
When we are on the detour, are we faithful? Do we keep our head up and stay strong? Do we maintain our integrity? It is when we are at our lowest, when the detours of life get us down, that we must remain vigilant. Some of the greatest people out there had detours in life that shaped who they are. Muhammed Ali is a great example. How did he become so great? Because of a stolen bike at age of 12. When he stated to a police officer that he wanted to beat up the person that took his bike, he was told he better learn to fight before he started challenging people. And so a great legend was born.
What is your detour? Is it a divorce? A blended family? A new job? A lost job? Whatever your detour is or was, how do you see it as life changing? How can we turn that bad detour into something positive? Had I not divorced, I would not be the strong person that I am today. My daughter (17 year old college student) would not be the strong young woman she is today. She has been molded into the loving, merciful, young woman that she is because of a detour. She told me not too long ago that had the divorce not happened she knows she would not be half the person she is today. She now knows inner strength, she now knows detours that may seem shattering at the time shape us and make us stronger people in the future.